Avoid the Problems that Stem from Divorce Myths

Each person who goes through a divorce will experience the process differently. No matter how your divorce progresses, the journey you’re on is yours, and yours alone. That’s why it is important to recognize that many of the common myths surrounding divorce are not only false, but they can be harmful to your self-image. If you’ve been buying into any of these common myths around divorce, the following will shed some light on the truth and, hopefully, put your mind at ease.

Harmful misconceptions about divorce that many people hold include:

• Myth #1: Divorce always harms children — Though your child might be upset by your divorce and the resulting changes to their routine, they also benefit by leaving behind an environment marked by marital conflict. When parents focus on providing peace and stability, young people should weather a divorce feeling loved and protected. As long as you both agree to a solid parenting plan where the children will be nurtured and everyone will be treated with respect, there are plenty of reasons to be optimistic that the children will be perfectly content with the family’s new arrangement.
• Myth #2: Getting a divorce means you’ve failed — Buying into the myth that divorce equals failure does nothing more than perpetuate feelings of shame where none belong. Many divorcing couples look back on the years they enjoyed sharing together while acknowledging that both parties are better off starting a new chapter. Working with a lawyer who can minimize conflict over financial and parenting terms so that you reach a simple divorce solution is a good way to move forward.
• Myth #3: You could have divorce-proofed your marriage — There is no such thing as a divorce-proof marriage. There is no crystal ball that will let a spouse foresee all the future challenges they will face in their marriage. It is simply impossible to anticipate, plan for, and transcend every potential scenario that can turn a marriage sour. People grow apart. They change. Life throws everyone curve balls. And yes, sometimes the people we trust disappoint us. Letting go of the myth that you somehow had control over your spouse or the events that ended your marriage is an important step toward happiness.

Forget the myths and the “should haves” or “could haves.” If it’s time to move on, let yourself embrace the next chapter of your life without tearing yourself down over the last.

Bryan L. Salamone & Associates, P.C. is the leading divorce and family law firms. Our attorneys and support staff work diligently in pursuit of the best result possible under the circumstances and New York law. If you are contemplating divorce or have been served with papers, feel free to contact us online or call 1.631.479.3839 for a free initial consultation.