The Impact Respect Can Have on a Breakup of a Marriage
Respect in a marriage does not stop at home. It is required in the public sphere as well. Today, most people have the ability to take videos and pictures right on their mobile phones. Because of this development, the chances that actions by one spouse outside of the home getting back to the other spouse becomes that much greater.
There have been many instances lately where pictures and videos of married people in compromising positions have surfaced with people other than their spouse. Just a few years ago, these encounters with other people might only get back to their spouses through scuttlebutt and rumors. Nowadays, it takes only minutes for these encounters to be posted to online social networks like Facebook and Twitter for the world to see.
Marriages are built upon a foundation of mutual respect and trust. The spouse that is seen in pictures or videos hugging or kissing another person might think it is simply an innocuous and silly action. However, the other spouse feels disrespected and betrayed having the general public, including friends, family, and work colleagues, witness a loved one in actions that can be construed as unfaithful acts. Acts of public disrespect cause embarrassment and humiliation that can irreparably harm a formerly loving relationship.
Recent allegations of acts or actions of disrespect by celebrity couples, including those of Kristen Stewart cheating on her boyfriend, Robert Pattinson, obviously get the most attention. However, public humiliations are just as devastating on everyday individuals in society as they are for celebrities. An individual who finds that their spouse is too intimate with another person by a Facebook post feels as if the entire world knows about this action.
Laura Boyle in a November 19, 2012 Huffington Post entry wrote that the “lack of respect causes more divorces than cheating does because for men, respect is like oxygen.” Disrespect by one spouse makes the other feel as if they are no longer valued and cherished as a partner. The feeling of disrespect is often too much a hurdle for marriages to overcome. Spouses need to be mindful of how their words and actions in public can be viewed by the other spouse, even when they are not around to witness it in person.
Bryan L. Salamone & Associates, P.C. has handled over 10,000 New York divorces and the statement of Laura Boyle rings true for hundreds of divorcing couples each year. If you do not want your spouse to see you doing something…don’t do it!