Co-parenting after a divorce, or the breakup of a nonmarital relationship, can be challenging, particularly when emotions are still raw. Everyone suffers when parents cannot communicate or cooperate on important matters relating to their children. Though it might seem strange at first, many people have found that adopting a business-like approach has benefited their co-parenting relationship.
It’s easy for people who were together for a long time to take each other for granted or let old resentments get in the way of current priorities. However, there are several business practices that can help you and your ex manage parenting responsibilities with less friction, such as:
- Adopting a formal schedule — In a business setting, meetings and appointments are typically scheduled well in advance. When a change must be made, professional courtesy demands that the other party be notified as soon as possible. Google Calendar and other apps make it easy for parents to establish and update a clear, formal schedule for custody exchanges, visitation and other important events. You can also keep track of extracurricular activities, school events and medical appointments.
- Maintaining a professional tone — Even when disagreements arise in a workplace or among contractual partners, it is well understood that resorting to personal insults and foul language makes the situation worse. Try to recognize that the same is true when communicating with your co-parent. Your words and tone should not be different than they would be in a corporate boardroom. Stick to the facts, avoid emotional language and stay solution-oriented.
- Setting clear boundaries and expectations — As companies know, the best way to eliminate confusion over important matters is to negotiate clear terms and formalize them in a document. Both parents should agree on boundaries and expectations regarding their interactions, such as when to call or text and how to handle discipline.
- Developing a framework for conflict resolution — Businesses often rely on formal processes for conflict resolution. In co-parenting, consider adopting similar methods for managing disputes. Having a predetermined plan, such as involving a neutral third-party mediator, can help both parents resolve issues constructively rather than letting disagreements escalate.
Developing a fair, comprehensive parenting plan after a breakup requires cooperation and mutual respect. Envisioning yourself and your ex as partners in the business of helping your children might be one way to move forward successfully. At Bryan L. Salamone & Associates, P.C., we work with clients throughout Long Island to help them secure fair custody terms and build positive co-parenting relationships. Please call 631-388-6009 or contact us online to schedule a consultation.